Woot! Officially booked this year's Nutcracker tickets. Pretty great seats for a pretty expensive price. But that's okay! Winter and Christmas feelings begin December 14th. The grinch leaves the building in two weeks.
Tomorrow is the start of a new month, the first legit month where I can actually start making money. We shall see how it goes. I feel like I am getting closer! I did make my first booking last week, which actually was quite exciting for me. I am currently waiting for free dinner and wasting time. I've already been here for 9 hours, might as well stay another hour!
...
Is it weird that I'm looking forward to walking around in the cold tonight with Starbucks? Things are changing and I can't control it.
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
My Rebuttal.
I would just like to mention that this is MY blog, my entries. A couple special people have commented on what I have written.
My rebuttal.
I don't have to change any of my thoughts. If you don't want to see what I have to say, don't read it. It is very simple. I do not feel bad about being honest, nor do I care if you are hurt. If someone actually makes me want to erase them from my life, I don't want reminders of them. I can say this, I have never deleted all reminders of anyone I have dated. This is a first. I can't say why this is, but I think it has to do with never being so disgusted with someone I thought I cared about... Further, never been so disgusted with myself that I put up with their bullshit for as long as I did. Yes, I feel sick about the entire situation, but not for losing you. I feel sick for losing out on so much time and excitement trying to persuade you that I was everything you needed. I know you will go back to what you find comfortable, and in doing that, you will give away a lot of your self-preservation and integrity. I'm thankful this isn't my concern anymore. You can be an empty shell walking around, I hope that fills your day with the love and happiness you seem to want so badly. Unfortunately you are incapable of being what you want to be.
I really did have hope that you weren't the asshole everyone seems to think you are, but as usual you have proven me wrong. Congratulations, you have lost your one true supporter, your stability and love.
I don't think there is anything that you could do to persuade me otherwise.
I'm going to try to forget about the "what if" questions that will be going through my head over the next couple weeks, and concentrate on the "yes" comments I will be saying.
My rebuttal.
I don't have to change any of my thoughts. If you don't want to see what I have to say, don't read it. It is very simple. I do not feel bad about being honest, nor do I care if you are hurt. If someone actually makes me want to erase them from my life, I don't want reminders of them. I can say this, I have never deleted all reminders of anyone I have dated. This is a first. I can't say why this is, but I think it has to do with never being so disgusted with someone I thought I cared about... Further, never been so disgusted with myself that I put up with their bullshit for as long as I did. Yes, I feel sick about the entire situation, but not for losing you. I feel sick for losing out on so much time and excitement trying to persuade you that I was everything you needed. I know you will go back to what you find comfortable, and in doing that, you will give away a lot of your self-preservation and integrity. I'm thankful this isn't my concern anymore. You can be an empty shell walking around, I hope that fills your day with the love and happiness you seem to want so badly. Unfortunately you are incapable of being what you want to be.
I really did have hope that you weren't the asshole everyone seems to think you are, but as usual you have proven me wrong. Congratulations, you have lost your one true supporter, your stability and love.
I don't think there is anything that you could do to persuade me otherwise.
I'm going to try to forget about the "what if" questions that will be going through my head over the next couple weeks, and concentrate on the "yes" comments I will be saying.
Monday, November 21, 2011
FindersKeepers.
I have decided that it's time to get back up... and by this I mean, believing that love is everything. Over the past little while, I have been constantly persuaded, purposefully or not, that love really is stupid and pointless. However, I do not want to continue with those types of thoughts. I much prefer to remember how wonderful it can make you feel, and how you sometimes will do anything for it. I used to think that, and it went away. I really hope to regain this sense of happiness and hopelessness.
Really, I am just throwing another into the pile of smelly, worn out, pieces of garbage of people that I definitely do not want. I'm okay with that.
(Great analogy coming right up.)
Because sometimes if you sift through enough garbage you find a treasure - something you cannot live without. Finders keepers. I hope the next person that comes along doesn't take this for granted, and they feel like they found something wonderful, and will do anything to keep it. I don't want to keep wasting my time with smelly, worn out pieces of garbage.
My life is too fabulous to let people bring me down to their level. 2011 has been a shit year, it really has. So here is to hoping that 2012 brings happiness, love and plenty of adventure. But most of all, someone who can keep up with my ever-changing attitude and lifestyle.
Cheers to starting fresh... again. :)
Really, I am just throwing another into the pile of smelly, worn out, pieces of garbage of people that I definitely do not want. I'm okay with that.
(Great analogy coming right up.)
Because sometimes if you sift through enough garbage you find a treasure - something you cannot live without. Finders keepers. I hope the next person that comes along doesn't take this for granted, and they feel like they found something wonderful, and will do anything to keep it. I don't want to keep wasting my time with smelly, worn out pieces of garbage.
My life is too fabulous to let people bring me down to their level. 2011 has been a shit year, it really has. So here is to hoping that 2012 brings happiness, love and plenty of adventure. But most of all, someone who can keep up with my ever-changing attitude and lifestyle.
Cheers to starting fresh... again. :)
Monday, November 14, 2011
Thats a Wrap.
Sometimes the last thing you want comes in first... And sometimes the first thing you want never comes. I know waiting is all you can do sometimes...
I'm waiting with my heart wide open.
I'm waiting with my heart wide open.
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